Start here

You don't have to know what you need yet. You just have to pick a door.

Betrayal puts two people in two very different chairs. What helps from one chair can make things worse from the other, so we've built this site around where you're sitting. Whether you're the one who broke trust, the one whose trust was broken, or you're still trying to get your bearings, the right first step is below.

For the man who broke trust

I did this. I want to repair it.

You've apologized. You've promised. It isn't landing, and you don't understand why. The 10-week Shame to Resilience workshop teaches what real repair looks like from your chair, alongside other men doing the same work.

See the workshop

For the partner who was betrayed

I need to understand what happened to me.

What you're feeling has a name, and it isn't overreacting. The Betrayal Trauma Guide explains what betrayal does to the brain and body, why it looks like PTSD, and what healing actually requires from him and from you.

Read the guide

Not sure yet

I want to understand the shame first.

Shame is running the show for the man who broke trust, and it shapes everything his partner sees. The free Shame Compass shows the four ways it takes over and how to catch it in the moment. Short, and a good first step for either of you.

Get the free guide

How people usually move through this

There's no required order. But most men who end up in the workshop, and most partners who end up feeling steadier, followed something like this.

1

Understand what's happening

Read the Betrayal Trauma Guide or download the Shame Compass. Free, and most people recognize themselves within a few pages.

2

Do one piece of real work

Take a self-paced course, watch the YouTube series, or read the blog. Small steps, on your own schedule.

3

Talk to a person

Book a free Pathfinder call. A short, private conversation about where you are and what a next step could look like. Not a pitch.

4

Commit to the work with others

The 10-week workshop for men, and the STR Community afterward, so the change holds.

A note on who we address. Duane works primarily with men who have betrayed their partners, so much of what you'll read here speaks to that man directly. Betrayal of men is just as devastating, and if you're a man whose trust was broken, the partner-side material applies to you completely.

Still not sure? Book a free Pathfinder call